NIT Swag Bag

“Congratulations players and coaches for reaching the Final Four of the NIT here at Madison Square Garden.

You all should be very proud for being one of the top four teams in college basketball.*

As a bonus, our sponsors have put together a little gift package to help you remember your time here in NY competing in the NIT. Here’s what you’ll find in your swag bag.

-Two gallons of Exon gasoline (regular)

-One dreamcatcher

-Two-for-one coupons for a Subway 6-inch sandwich. (Not good on premium sandwiches).

-A bootlegged copy of “Wife Swap” season 3.

-A 2011 NIT Final Four magnet leftover from last year.

-A slice of pepperoni from Joe’s #2 Pizza on 42nd St. (Must present coupon during purchase).

-One Wyoming State Quarter. (Spending quarter is a violation of NCAA regulations. Quarter is only meant to be admired for its beauty in depicting the great state of Wyoming).

Congratulations again!

*You know, other than those 68 other teams that made the real tournament.”

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About Andrew Sleighter

I'm a comedian from Seattle, recently transplanted to Los Angeles. I like watching sports.
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